High on emotion

Washing of the Water - Peter Gabriel

River, river carry me on
Living river carry me on
River, river carry me on
To the place where I come from

So deep, so wide, will you take me on your back for a ride
If I should fall, would you swallow me deep inside

River, show me how to float
I feel like I'm sinking down
Thought that I could get along
But here in this water
My feet won't touch the ground
I need something to turn myself around

Going away, away towards the sea
River deep, can you lift up and carry me
Oh roll on though the heartland'
Til the sun has left the sky
River, river carry me high'
Til the washing of the water make it all allright
Let your waters reach me like she reached me tonight

Letting go, it's so hard
The way it's hurting now
To get this love untied
So tough to stay with thing'
Cause if I follow through
I face what I denied
I get those hooks out of me
And I take out the hooks that I sunk deep in your side
Kill that fear of emptiness, loneliness I hide

River, oh river, river running deep
Bring me something that will let me get to sleep
In the washing of the water will you take it all away
Bring me something to take this pain away


Sometimes, I have so much to say that I don't know what to say, so I'll let lyrics say it for me. Usually, someone else's. 

It's possible to be happy, excited and looking forward to good things, appreciating all you are and all you have, yet still be sad, feel let down, frustrated, and isolated. 

A few hours ago, my thoughts were a lot more articulate. Now? I've listened to too much emotional music, sung too loud and scared the cats away. Here I was thinking they only didn't like 'I Am Woman'. Seems they also do not like Chris De Burgh.

Today has been a walk down memory lane. I'm a long way from where I started and yet I feel like I've not gone very far at all. 

I will wake up tomorrow and it will be a good day, for I will make it so.

Everything's changed, but it's still the same

I like it here. It's my safe place. The people who know me here are people I trust. Facebook is staged. This is me raw; shoeless, dirt on my face, in an old t-shirt that hasn't been washed in too long. I'll tell you things I wouldn't tell you in person, but I'll say them anyway, when they need to be said.

No naming names, as usual. There'll be initials and pseudonyms. That's how it works. If you join me on this ride (again, or anew), hang on. I'm not sure where it's headed.

I'm frustrated, yet content. I think that's just how deep thinkers live.

Kalliope. Epic poetry. My life.