Why today is so good
Because I survived yesterday. No, really!
Not sure why, but I was feeling pretty yuck in the stomach. I dropped by my place to pick up my laptop and try to finish (finally!) the first piece I was writing for Subter.com. I was also annoyed because, due to aforementioned upset stomach, I wasn't up to going to gym. C got home a bit after 7 with two bunches of flowers ("coz one wasn't big enough"). I think I need to clone him, so I can have one at work and at home.
Anyway, he asked if I was hungry or if I wanted to go walking. No, not hungry, but struggling to find the right ending to my writing, agreed to the walk. Are you sure? Yes, I'm ok to walk. So off we go.
No sooner had we crossed the street and gone past a few houses, there was a buzzing near my ear. Then in my ear. That's when I turned into a crazy person. You know the type; flapping arms about in public, cursing and looking as though they're arguing with the people inside their head. The ones you don't make eye contact with and make sure you keep on the other side of the street. That was me. I was dead set certain a fly had flown into my ear and didn't want to come out. Looking back now, I really should ask C what he meant when he looked in and said, "No, can't see anything in there". I didn't believe him anyway, and kept slapping my head and sticking my finger in my ear for the next 50 metres or so.
I'll tell you why. Years ago, I had a psycho housemate. Yes, he truly was. He moved in shortly before my birthday and had 2 dozen long stemmed red roses sent to my work and he'd ring me two or three times a day to see if I'd called him for any reason (and that's just the start of it). Anyway, we were at home one night and this massive Mo-Fo of a moth (similar to Ian's moth) flew into his ear and went right inside his head. I kid you not! What was worse was that we could clearly hear it buzzing in his head and eventually, hours later (and after me doing really well not to throw up at the thought of it), he went to the doctor to get it out.
So I was sure that the fly had taken up residence in my head and promptly flipped out like some crazed mad-woman, just up the road from C's house. After I explained to C why it was sooo necessary for him to make absolutely sure there was no winged creature living in my head, we laughed and kept walking. Well, he laughed and I was secretly wondering how long it would take a fly to decay and drop out of my ear in the shower. Seriously. Even now, I'm not entirely confident it's gone.
And on we walked. It wasn't my day. Really. Somehow, something flew into my eye and it stung like shit. It felt like it was still in my eye. Again, C had to check to see what alien life form had attacked his defenceless girlfriend this time. Hold your eyelid up. Ok, look up. Look down. I'm sure he was doing all that just to appease me. But dear lord, my eye was watering and it felt like someone stuck a pin through it.
Then there was a little fluffy toy dog thing that tried to eat me. Well, not really, but C put his arms around me to protect me anyway. The dog's owners just looked bewildered.
Next time we go walking, I'm gonna wear a full face helmet, ear muffs and boxing gloves, just for good measure. It's not safe out there, I tell ya!
Not sure why, but I was feeling pretty yuck in the stomach. I dropped by my place to pick up my laptop and try to finish (finally!) the first piece I was writing for Subter.com. I was also annoyed because, due to aforementioned upset stomach, I wasn't up to going to gym. C got home a bit after 7 with two bunches of flowers ("coz one wasn't big enough"). I think I need to clone him, so I can have one at work and at home.
Anyway, he asked if I was hungry or if I wanted to go walking. No, not hungry, but struggling to find the right ending to my writing, agreed to the walk. Are you sure? Yes, I'm ok to walk. So off we go.
No sooner had we crossed the street and gone past a few houses, there was a buzzing near my ear. Then in my ear. That's when I turned into a crazy person. You know the type; flapping arms about in public, cursing and looking as though they're arguing with the people inside their head. The ones you don't make eye contact with and make sure you keep on the other side of the street. That was me. I was dead set certain a fly had flown into my ear and didn't want to come out. Looking back now, I really should ask C what he meant when he looked in and said, "No, can't see anything in there". I didn't believe him anyway, and kept slapping my head and sticking my finger in my ear for the next 50 metres or so.
I'll tell you why. Years ago, I had a psycho housemate. Yes, he truly was. He moved in shortly before my birthday and had 2 dozen long stemmed red roses sent to my work and he'd ring me two or three times a day to see if I'd called him for any reason (and that's just the start of it). Anyway, we were at home one night and this massive Mo-Fo of a moth (similar to Ian's moth) flew into his ear and went right inside his head. I kid you not! What was worse was that we could clearly hear it buzzing in his head and eventually, hours later (and after me doing really well not to throw up at the thought of it), he went to the doctor to get it out.
So I was sure that the fly had taken up residence in my head and promptly flipped out like some crazed mad-woman, just up the road from C's house. After I explained to C why it was sooo necessary for him to make absolutely sure there was no winged creature living in my head, we laughed and kept walking. Well, he laughed and I was secretly wondering how long it would take a fly to decay and drop out of my ear in the shower. Seriously. Even now, I'm not entirely confident it's gone.
And on we walked. It wasn't my day. Really. Somehow, something flew into my eye and it stung like shit. It felt like it was still in my eye. Again, C had to check to see what alien life form had attacked his defenceless girlfriend this time. Hold your eyelid up. Ok, look up. Look down. I'm sure he was doing all that just to appease me. But dear lord, my eye was watering and it felt like someone stuck a pin through it.
Then there was a little fluffy toy dog thing that tried to eat me. Well, not really, but C put his arms around me to protect me anyway. The dog's owners just looked bewildered.
Next time we go walking, I'm gonna wear a full face helmet, ear muffs and boxing gloves, just for good measure. It's not safe out there, I tell ya!
posted by E in Oz at 3:03 pm
these thoughts escaped my brain at 3:03 pm
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