Purely positive

I don't think I've specifically written a post on here about T. That's largely because he's much more private than me, in that he doesn't put his life and thoughts on line for the world to see, so I try to respect that as much as I can, while still sharing my own thoughts. It's also because, apart from some of the normal miscommunications most couples have, everything is ridiculously peachy; I don't want to perpetually gush.

I think we've both got pretty normal fears or insecurities that come with a new relationship. What I'm finding is that the distance component is not as difficult as I thought it would be. Yes, it totally sucks sometimes and on a day like today, where we're both having crap days, it'd be great if we could be together. But, save being in the same time zone, I couldn't be more content.

I thought the stranger I lived with was good at showing how he felt and following through. Initially, he was, but when he started saying things like "relationships are about competition" and "you need to keep secrets from your partner", I began to see that we didn't really share the same ideals at all.

T is unlike anyone I've ever had a relationship with before. That bothers him sometimes. He worries that it's a negative. For me, it's definitely a positive. He brings out a part of me I've not shared before and it's more of who I am than I've allowed myself to be previously. He's content with me being me. It's hard to wrap my head around sometimes. I know I can irritate him. He's an instant reaction kinda guy. I prefer to think about things for a while and work out the best way to approach it before I react. It makes him think I am mad at him, when more than likely I'm just taking longer to process the situation.

He's very funny. He doesn't think he is. I do. He's intense to the same degree as me, but in a different way. We both worry to an irrational degree about each other's wellbeing. I like it though. It's because we care.

He likes my cats, which is a good thing, considering he'll be forced to endure living with all three of us in a few months' time. The fact that he thinks they both have psychological issues is something else. I tend to agree with him, particularly since one of them has a distinct "what do you think you're doing with my mother?" look whenever he contemplates getting close to me. I really should take a photo one day.

We talk for a good couple of hours every day. Time differences mean that my already disturbed sleep is further interrupted. I wouldn't have it any other way. Well, yes I would. Can't be changed though, so I accept it. I'll be pleased the day daylight savings is over, and three hours difference becomes two. We'll both get more sleep.

He sends me text messages all the time. More than anything, it's nice to know someone's thinking about you, even when they're doing something completely unrelated.

It was pretty scary for me to think about getting involved with someone again and allow myself to be vulnerable. I'm glad I did. The next step is accepting the vulnerability that I don't feel yet, but am sure I will, about putting my life here on pause (and ultimately leaving it behind), to have a chance at a new one. Scary, but exciting....and definitely worth the risk.