Heavy sigh...
The light at the end of the tunnel? I ain't seeing it. Only a long tunnel.
T feels kinda helpless and like he's done something, or is doing something wrong. He hasn't. Not at all. He's being great.
It's just the circumstances that suck. I am not quitting, backing out, or giving up. It's just hard at the moment. And I don't like how it's making me feel...how I'm making T feel.
T feels kinda helpless and like he's done something, or is doing something wrong. He hasn't. Not at all. He's being great.
It's just the circumstances that suck. I am not quitting, backing out, or giving up. It's just hard at the moment. And I don't like how it's making me feel...how I'm making T feel.
posted by E in Oz at 9:58 pm
these thoughts escaped my brain at 9:58 pm
5 Comments:
I think it's hard for guys to not be able to fix something that's wrong...they're born and raised as problem solvers. If there's truly nothing going on that you can put your finger on, it's probably hormonal (and man, do I hate to admit it when that's the case! It makes me feel so damn obnoxious!). He should be able to understand that - I'm sure you're not the first chick he's known with hormones. But if there really IS something on your mind, maybe it's time to test the waters and confide in him. I know for me, that was the hardest thing...confiding in Kyle about things that in the past resulted in being left or losing the love of someone I thought I needed.
Your call of course...but there's a guardedness about you, that I recognize from myself. T. seems like a warm and loving friend. Whatever it is, hormones or something more, I think he wants to be included.
I have two problems when it comes to solving relationship problems. 1- I don't like sharing every last bit of myself like that... I've always had problems trusting folks, and 2- I can't always put my finger on exactly what's wrong.
The good news is that he's sticking it out. The better news is that you are too. You don't have to fix everything, and in fact, I think the whole idea of a "perfect relationship" is kind of misleading anyway. There will always be "stuff." You stuff, him stuff, couple stuff, family stuff... something will always need work... and other things, you just have to accept at face value. Just a thought. ;)
You had plans. Now, all the plans are up in the air. You are in limbo again, and he (through his job) is part of that crazy-making chaos. You were going to leave, and now you're staying.
I hate when that happens. It puts me in a funk. So that may be a big part of it.
When he's in a funk, you are patient and let him work it out. He knows you're there. He should consider extending the same support to you.
It really is mind muddling to make decisions about huge, life-changing things and then have to back off and reconsider.
KT and Monica had good things to say. You are both hanging in there and that's a good sign. Also as Monica wisely said, there's ALWAYS going to be stuff and that's part of a relationship. If you guys both want this to work, you'll work the stuff this time. There's bound to be disappointment and frustration from changed plans but if you both stick it out, there will be a future. Hang in there!
hugs,
a
I don't know what is going on...but I have felt very sad by this post.The distance thing you and he endure cant be easy E...I feel for you and sincerely hope things improve.
Post a Comment
<< Home