Choices...what to do
I have to move out of my townhouse at the end of February. Well I don't have to, but I have an evil landlord and I'm not inclined to keep feeding his bank balance for any longer than is absolutely necessary.
C and I have talked about me moving into his place. He was the one who first brought it up, ages ago, but we decided a couple of weeks ago we'd put that conversation on the backburner till we'd spent some more time together.
Really, we've been cohabiting the entire time we've been together. Moving in would mean that I just don't have to drive 40 minutes to another house each night to feed my cats and I can stop living out of back packs and travel bags. But then it's so much more than that too.
It would also mean a big financial benefit for us both if I did. But then, I'd be paying more in petrol to get to work, because it doubles my current trip.
At the same time, I have to consider other options, which begs the question, where do I move to? Do I move closer to work (somewhere I don't want to be terribly much longer), and further away from C? Or do I move closer to C and further away from work? Or there is option 3 which is to remain where I am for another 6 months, but I'm not at all comfortable with that idea, because the place is just too big for me and it's a waste of money, when I could get something more appropriate for less.
If I don't move in with C, it would be likely I would in another 6 months, which means I'd have to move twice. An idea I'm not keen on, since I've moved 17 times in the last 15 years and I'm tired of not having some sort of 'base'.
In all of this, I have to consider what I want to do in relation to work. I'm not too fussed on the actual job I want, as long as I enjoy whatever I'm doing. But where to look? If I go back to corporate (which I think I'd hate, after being able to wear casual clothes every day for the last 3 1/2 years), then it'll be a city job. That'd mean more money, but again, depending on where I am living, would be approximately a 60-80 minute trip each morning.
If I look for a job in the suburbs in between where C and I are now (which is mostly construction or major manufacturing - industries I've worked in before), I'd get less money, but it might be an easier lifestyle to a certain degree.
Right now, I really am at a loss what to do. I have about 6 weeks top to decide and where I work and live are going to have to mesh somehow, so it's not a simple decision.
I don't want to live with C just because I can, or because I haven't got any other options. If it's going to happen, then I'll make sure I'm comfortable with my reasoning for it. I've never actually had to choose whether or not I was going to live with a boyfriend. It always just seemed to work out that way by itself. This time it's going to be a conscious choice and for some reason I'm just not allowing myself to think about how I feel about it.
Will have to face it soon, though.
C and I have talked about me moving into his place. He was the one who first brought it up, ages ago, but we decided a couple of weeks ago we'd put that conversation on the backburner till we'd spent some more time together.
Really, we've been cohabiting the entire time we've been together. Moving in would mean that I just don't have to drive 40 minutes to another house each night to feed my cats and I can stop living out of back packs and travel bags. But then it's so much more than that too.
It would also mean a big financial benefit for us both if I did. But then, I'd be paying more in petrol to get to work, because it doubles my current trip.
At the same time, I have to consider other options, which begs the question, where do I move to? Do I move closer to work (somewhere I don't want to be terribly much longer), and further away from C? Or do I move closer to C and further away from work? Or there is option 3 which is to remain where I am for another 6 months, but I'm not at all comfortable with that idea, because the place is just too big for me and it's a waste of money, when I could get something more appropriate for less.
If I don't move in with C, it would be likely I would in another 6 months, which means I'd have to move twice. An idea I'm not keen on, since I've moved 17 times in the last 15 years and I'm tired of not having some sort of 'base'.
In all of this, I have to consider what I want to do in relation to work. I'm not too fussed on the actual job I want, as long as I enjoy whatever I'm doing. But where to look? If I go back to corporate (which I think I'd hate, after being able to wear casual clothes every day for the last 3 1/2 years), then it'll be a city job. That'd mean more money, but again, depending on where I am living, would be approximately a 60-80 minute trip each morning.
If I look for a job in the suburbs in between where C and I are now (which is mostly construction or major manufacturing - industries I've worked in before), I'd get less money, but it might be an easier lifestyle to a certain degree.
Right now, I really am at a loss what to do. I have about 6 weeks top to decide and where I work and live are going to have to mesh somehow, so it's not a simple decision.
I don't want to live with C just because I can, or because I haven't got any other options. If it's going to happen, then I'll make sure I'm comfortable with my reasoning for it. I've never actually had to choose whether or not I was going to live with a boyfriend. It always just seemed to work out that way by itself. This time it's going to be a conscious choice and for some reason I'm just not allowing myself to think about how I feel about it.
Will have to face it soon, though.
posted by E in Oz at 2:38 pm
these thoughts escaped my brain at 2:38 pm
4 Comments:
ok so I haven't got much advice on this one right now, as I'm working on something similar. But as I think over my version of the situation (guess who else has their lease coming up the first week of February?) I will let you know what I come up with.
Just wanted to let you know that you shouldn't base yourself on anyone else's timelines. I know you know that already, but thought it oculd stand being repeated.
hugs,
R
Wow...you're brain sounds full. What's your gut tellin you? :)
I'm with Sandy. Go with your gut. ALWAYS go with your gut. Get away for a day all to yourself (go hiking, it's nice and sunny on your side of the world), take a note pad of paper and just free-write. Don't worry about sentence structure, spelling, or anything else. Just write what comes into your head. Doesn't matter the topic.
When you've spent at least an hour doing this, hike back home and read over what you've written and put the puzzle pieces together.
You'll get your answer.
Sometimes you just gotta give things a go to see if they will work or not. And if it doesn't? Well in 6 months time you'll just be in the same position you will be if you stay there.
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